Another “Ripped from the headlines”. There is a news item headlining today’s paper. It’s about a gentleman that runs a restaurant in New Hampshire. He escaped from his native Lebanon some years ago and recently became a citizen of the United States. For some reason unclear to me, he decided to make a trip back to his native Lebanon to visit relatives. It appears that parts of his former life in Lebanon didn’t escape official notice and he’s been detained. To make matters worse, he’s suffering from a chronic medical condition about which I suspect Lebanese officials care little to not at all. And while I feel tragically sorry for him, my question first and foremost, with Hezbollah currently running Lebanon, is, “what were you thinking?”
As a school administrator, I was with fair frequency sitting across the desk from students who had committed some typically small infraction. I’d ask, “Can you explain your thought process as you were . . . . . ?” or “What was going through your mind as you were . . . . . . .” Follow-up question: “At any point did it occur to you that pulling the keys off a computer keyboard wasn’t a good idea, or best use of your time?” Those probing inquiries would usually elicit a shrug of the shoulders and a muttered “I don’t know. I didn’t really think about it.” Aha – we’re at the root of the problem.
It seems that, with fair regularity, we’re reading about people caught in places they perhaps should not have been in the first place. The American writer that provoked the North Koreans with his gestures of protest. The college students on a brisk mountain hike that didn’t realize they’d crossed over into Iran. Question – the Alps, the Pyrenees, or the Rockies wouldn’t have provided the same sorts of experiences? At this point, the State Department must have somewhere in the Truman Building a Department of “Getting Them Back”. Daily or weekly, we’re begging some oppressive regime to release Americans who arguably shouldn’t have been where they were in the first place. What follows are repeated, tearful pleas from their parents, covered extensively on national and local media. A picture of Mom and Dad sitting on the couch in a room that cries out for Jonathan and Drew to work their magic, but I digress. They pretty much say the same things. “They just wanted to explore the region.” “They weren’t breaking any laws.” “It was a field trip to Syria.” “They were in the wrong place at the wrong time.” I can just see these detainees shrugging their shoulders and expressing defiantly, “I really didn’t give it much thought.”
Which brings us to the next question – how do we get them out? There is, of course, the court of public opinion. However, international outrage seems to be having less and less impact on despots as time goes by. Bashar al-Assad does not seem to give as much thought to his personal image as to hanging on to power in Syria. Even Vladimir Putin, a duly elected head of state, doesn’t express much regret in meddling in our 2016 presidential election. We haven’t heard any public statements from him that “I’ve learned my lesson, and I surely won’t do that again.” So, we know that international public embarrassment doesn’t work because, well, authoritarian regimes don’t really care. It’s a bit like being Prince Andrew – just stay indoors and out of sight for a while and hope it blows over.
That brings us to the other long arm of leverage. We “freeze their assets”. Now, that brings up a whole host of questions for me. In the Lebanese case, does Hezbollah have checking accounts at Bank of America and Chase? Maybe they were behind all those dummy accounts at Wells Fargo. Do terrorist cells have Mastercard and Discover, with their actual names on them? I’m trying to imagine a conversation in customer service with a member of the Taliban. “My VISA card was lost in a car bombing in Kabul. No, I don’t remember the card number or secret code. I need a replacement. Just send it to my mountain retreat in Pakistan.” Do they own stock in Exxon/Mobil? We do know that Iran had a whole pile of cash in the US, which the World Court ordered us to give back. It’s possible, though, that in recent years, Iranian officials have been withdrawing their money and the heck with the fees for early withdrawal. What other assets do unfriendly governments have here? Are they silent partners in Ivanka Trump’s line of boots? Do they own real estate? Does the leader of Yemen have a beach house in Malibu? Does Kim Jong Un own a penthouse in New York or a five-hundred -acre ranch in Arizona? If so, the real estate agents have a lot of explaining to do. In the ultimate irony, perhaps some African dictator may own US Treasury bonds. Wouldn’t that be quite a development? The Department of Justice should look into it once the Roger Stone business is wrapped up.
So, the question remains: why do Americans that to all outward appearances seem to be reasonable, rational, thinking adults choose to take a semester abroad in one of the world’s hot spots? What research about Iraq is so important that you have to go there? Isn’t this like a nice retired couple saying, “We’ve always wanted visit China.” OK, but not now. Don’t even take a cruise along the coast of Japan. Don’t plan a business trip to Beijing or Hong Kong. Pick up the phone and call, or send an email. If you’re a contestant on “Wheel of Fortune” and the trip this week is to beautiful Afghanistan, don’t go no matter what Pat and Vanna tell you. If you’ve planned a sailing trip along the coast of Somalia, you might want to consider a coast elsewhere. Say, for example, you walk into your local branch bank seeking foreign currencies and are asked, “You want how many Turkish lira?” or told “We don’t usually keep many Pakistani rupees on hand.” Alarm bells, people! My fellow Americans, exercise restraint. Don’t put yourself in harm’s way. Don’t make the State Department work overtime. When it comes to Americans traveling to the world’s troubled areas, I’m thinking . . . . . definitely not.
I'm Thinking...No! 