During our television watching this morning, Her Ladyship pointed out that, in an ad for detergent, the laundry shelf over the washing machine only had one container. I, to be honest, was shocked and, quite frankly, appalled. What is this family thinking? Were they militia members in a bunker some place, they wouldn’t last a week. I always keep an extra bottle or three at the ready, and am mocked routinely for it.
In my defense, however, the Princess is accompanying her laundry home this weekend. I’m picking her up tomorrow, and may need a box truck to get it all home. As I’ve written before, she maintains a full-service laundry here – she puts in the loads and then retreats to the couch, while her father transfers them to the dryer, whereupon it’s brought to the folding facility where her mother folds and stacks it neatly. From her perspective, it is much more satisfying and cost-effective for me to drive into Boston every couple of weeks than for her to travel fifty yards or so to the laundry room in her apartment complex. We do have the benefit of her singing “taps” as she throws out an empty detergent bottle. But I digress.
I do like to have back-ups in case we run short of something. In the store yesterday, I picked up an extra two-pack of paper towel, as I only had one roll in reserve. Cleaning out a closet the other day, I came across a 10-pack of toilet paper that I ordered on line during the pandemic. But, as you know, times were tough and it wasn’t always available. I also picked up an extra ice-melt because we’re having a storm today and I only had one in reserve, plus, of course, the one I’ve already started using. And I had to order a couple more filters for the furnace because I used the last one.
Some people, I’ve heard, actually run out of something before they buy more. Personally, I can’t imagine that. We’re having meatloaf tonight. I pulled some ground turkey out of the freezer yesterday, leaving only one in reserve. I’ll pick up one or two more when I go the store next. There’s something very comforting about having what we need on hand.
I used to tease Her Ladyship back in the days when she was doing most or all of the cooking. She didn’t stockpile much, but any time our supply of tuna fish dipped below a half dozen cans, general panic would set in. That was in the days when a can of tuna contained more than a tablespoon. Now, it takes two or three cans just to make a sandwich. I bought extra bottles of ketchup and mustard this past week, because the ones we had were down below three-quarters. You never know when a ketchup emergency will spring up. Mayo and Miracle Whip extras are on hand as well. We use them daily (yes, in case you are wondering, Herself prefers Miracle Whip, as did her late father), and running out is unthinkable.
In the fridge, I had a goodly supply of a sugar-free drink that the Princess recommended several years ago. Had just stocked up, in fact, when in a phone call, she alerted me to a problem. Apparently, so she read on line, they contain an artificial sweetener that is toxic. Ok, not completely toxic, like drinking bleach, but may contribute as many harmful conditions as most of the medications I see advertised. So, that went down the drain to kill anything living in the septic tank. That’s one of the disadvantages of building reserves. If they prove fatal down the road, you’re stuck with ample supplies. Coffee, for example, runs the gamut. Sometimes, it’s full of wonderfully beneficial nutrients, and the next, it’s killing test rodents at an alarming rate. I’ve decided to err on the side of nutrients and keep drinking. Besides, the caffeine keeps me going from nap to nap. I prefer cream to milk in my coffee, but have been forced to switch to non-dairy creamers, which do the job. And I keep an extra quart at the ready so I won’t run out and be forced to use Elizabeth’s oat milk. That never gets my coffee to the right color, although she insists that it’s “rich and flavorful”. Ok. Not seeing it.
There are some items that you can’t adequately stockpile. Fresh fruit, for example, which has a shelf life of about a half to three quarters of an hour before it turns brown. Salad greens also have an annoying habit of turning on a dime. So, I buy some, wait a day or so, throw it out and buy more. Her Ladyship informs me from time to time that we’re eating way too many salads and she’s getting sick of them. But I tell her that we have to, otherwise it’s turned to garden compost. Expiration dates are also the enemy of proper stockpiling. I did a quick inventory of our salad dressings the other day, throwing out a couple that we six months past their sell-by dates. That, of course, means that my back-ups in several categories are at dangerously low levels. Time to restock.
I also like to keep secure levels of paper goods – printer paper, envelopes, and stamps. Actually, I’m down to one working ream of paper, so I should pop over to the office supply store across the street. Buying stamps is problematic because the self-service machine at the post office doesn’t really like me. It usually rejects my debit card once or twice before reading the chip and granting me an audience with the supreme stamp ruler. I also like to keep the gas tank full, in case I need to make a sudden dash across the country. Here in cold weather, you don’t really like to let the tank get low, and my compulsive nature coincides favorably with that. I also like to keep an adequate supply of windshield washer fluid handy, although I haven’t bought any in a couple of years and still have two or three jugs in the garage.
Some stockpiling is the result of forgetfulness. I bought some peanut butter last week thinking I was down, only to find that I had two more in the cupboard. If my supplies are in multiple locations, that contributes to oversupply. I’ll pick up some picture hooks on the assumption that I’m out. In reality, I’ve got lots of them in the basement – just can’t remember where I put them. Years ago, we were cleaning out the home of some elderly relatives. Going down the cellar stairs and tucked in between eaves, we found 32 jars of instant coffee. The prices on them ranged from 18 to 23 cents, so they’d been there a while. By rights, we probably should have called in a HAZMAT team from the EPA to take them away. We might even have qualified for an environmental clean-up grant. That fine line between maintaining an adequate supply and hoarding was well behind them.
Her Ladyship confines most of her stockpiling to Christmas wrapping – paper, boxers, bows, tags, that sort of thing. You may have read my blog on preparing for the holidays. That answers any questions you may have. My late father-in-law tended to collect and save as well. A neighbor remarked once that his garage was like having Home Depot next door. Most anything hardware-related was there.
Well, time to wrap this up and make a shopping list for tomorrow. The Princess will be home tomorrow, and I need to pick up some oat milk and laundry detergent, just in case.
I'm Thinking...No! 