From time to time, I can’t resist reposting some things that are truly ageless. One is wrapping Christmas, birthday, or other big event gifts. I really can’t abide those new car commercials with a bow on the hood. Really? No thought went into that whatsoever. There’s a Toyota commercial this year that has a bunch of cars fully wrapped for the holidays. Now that’s more like it. As our house fills up with new arrivals and takes on a certain “warehouse” look obscuring the house decorations we put out in a nod to tradition. Because in rereading this, much still works, and I’m therefore sharing the joy again. While more’s the pity that some of the worl doesn’t wrap, here in the United States, the boon that we provide to retail is equaled only by the astronomical purchases we make to help the wrapping paper and ribbon industries flourish. We’re making these ventures Build Back Better. I’m suggesting that, as the Great British Baking Show is wildly popular, and now with chocolate version that I enjoy watching but hope never to attempt, it’s time for the Great American Wrapping Show. Twelve contestants are selected to compete wrapping and decorating all sorts of shapes and sizes of presents. There could be Bike Week, or Boots without Boxes. Anything with rectangles or squares is off the table. No bags, no gift boxes, no premade bows. Contestants must fashion their own decorative embellishments, and anyone caught sneaking accessories from Walmart around the tent flaps is immediately dismissed. Her Ladyship could be the Paul and Pru of decorative gift wraps. HGVT and the Hallmark Channel might produce webinars, and emergency ZOOM available conferences should someone’s wrapping go really badly.
Continue reading “The Great American Wrapping Show”Author: Thomas Walters
Thanksgiving Traditions Return
Thanksgiving is coming back. People are traveling, the airlines can’t keep up, gas prices shooting through the roof. Some guy’s loaded handgun went off during a luggage inspection in Atlanta the other day. Don’t you wonder what kind of family gathering he was heading to? Infection rates are going back up, but no matter. The only masks in the supermarket are the cashiers and myself. Yes, indeed, America is returning to normal. Bouncing back to our normal levels of insanity. While I write this, there’s a huge wild turkey poking its way through the front garden. I look at it, and it looks back at me with a certain interested yet defiant attitude. It’s perfectly safe because we’ve already got a Butterball in the fridge. I decided to repost here some of my favorite Thanksgiving memories because, well, in truth, it’s timely and I’m too lazy busy to start from scratch.
First Steps to Christmas
No, we haven’t started decorating yet. We haven’t even started writing Christmas cards, giving thought to Christmas meals, or who will be where. Those are all things to come later, but not much later.
Continue reading “First Steps to Christmas”Falling into . . . . . . Fall
Ok – it’s the inevitable march of the seasons. Here in the Northeast, the signs are all there. The trees have lost their leaves and the fall colors are gone. We’re into that no-persons land of stark tree branches and browning earth. Although, this year it’s been warmer than usual and the grass, believe it or now, is still a bit green.
Continue reading “Falling into . . . . . . Fall”“Remoting” Once Again
Two years ago, I wrote about control of the television remotes. We have about six, and in a full and honest acknowledgement fair, I have no idea what most of them do. One came with the television, so that one turns it on. What the other buttons do, well, . . . . Another is cable access, thank you very much, Xfinity. Others activate “streaming” services, of which we have several and only lately have we come to use them – typically when the Princess is home and she needs to watch some obscure movie for a class. We have non-television related remotes too. Her Ladyship just got a new lamp, controlled by a remote device. She can be bathed in a warm, golden glow, or there’s a setting for a bluish light – I guess that’s in case the living room enters a cloud and fogs up. Of course, it comes with basic services too – on and off. One of its curious quirks is that, should the power blip at any point, the lamp comes on. That’s fun when I get up at 2 AM and notice light pouring out of the living room. Then I have to search for the right remote, punching off buttons on many of the wrong ones in the process and thus deprogramming as I go.
Continue reading ““Remoting” Once Again”If One Picture is Worth . . . . . . .
Perhaps you’ve seen the advertising for the new cellphones that have literally a cluster of cameras on the back. Pictures are crisper and cleaner, the colors are bolder and more lifelike. If you’re like me, I tend toward the “less is more” when it comes to pictures. Or maybe you’re one of those folks that take way, way more pictures that they need to.
Continue reading “If One Picture is Worth . . . . . . .”A Tale of Two Chairs
It was the best of Customer Service, it was the worst of Customer Service.
We purchased a power lift chair for Her Ladyship two years ago from a reputable furniture chain. She’s had difficulty getting up and down owing to knee surgery a few years back, and this greatly aided her mobility. We bought the extended warranty, on the assumption that it’s lots of mechanical parts, more like an appliance than a piece of furniture, and might not have the lifespan that furniture typically does. So, off we go.
Continue reading “A Tale of Two Chairs”My Annual Ode to Fall
Yes, I know. It’s that time again. There are bright spots – the young folk are back in school. The nights (and days) are cooler. The summer traffic is easing. And the trees are turning color. Out come my fleeces and flannel.
Continue reading “My Annual Ode to Fall”Out of Afghanistan
Much has been said and written about America’s excursions into Afghanistan and its lamentable scramble to get out. There is a ton of finger pointing. In fact, those that were part of the invasion in the first place and roundly proclaimed its noble purpose are now speaking out most loudly about what went wrong with the mission to extract Americans and American sympathizers. Who’s to blame? Those that brought us in, those that allowed us to stay, or those left holding the bag for wrapping up the whole mess?
Continue reading “Out of Afghanistan”Woodchuck Alert: Code Red!
For many of my readers, a woodchuck on the property is not a huge deal. However, earlier this week, I noticed that one of my new, I should mention, containers had most of its petunias chewed off. As it sits on a bench about two feet off the ground, it didn’t seem like a molestation by bunnies or chipmunks. No, no. This is the work of a dreaded woodchuck or gopher. Further garden inspection saw chewed leaves on dead nettles and wholesale destruction of some beautiful yellow coneflowers I’d just put in a few weeks ago. Now I know what it feels like when someone’s home is invaded by burglars or someone breaks into an unlocked car. There is a sense of personal violation. Some will argue that a rodent feeding itself isn’t quite in league in terms of malicious intent, but I have mixed feelings.
Continue reading “Woodchuck Alert: Code Red!”
I'm Thinking...No! 